Reflecting on 17 Years of Grassroots
I'm writing this from the beach in San Sebastián, Spain, reflecting on 17 years of Grassroots California.
I just finished working Spannabis in Bilbao, which happened to overlap this year with 4/20, our anniversary. This year felt different. In fact, it was the first 4/20 I can remember where I didn't smoke, and definitely the first Spannabis where I didn't.
Ironically, today marks another milestone: 200 days without smoking. Next month, I'll hit two years alcohol free. Right now, I feel more balanced than I ever have, and finding balance has become my ultimate goal. Recently, I realized I was using weed the same way I was using booze — as an escape rather than dealing with reality. Maybe one day I'll smoke again, but right now it feels nice to not need anything.
As you read this, I want you to know that what balance looks like for me might not be the same for you. My hope is that even one small piece of this resonates and helps you make a positive change. Not long ago, things weren't looking great for me. I wish I had the awareness I have now 10 years ago. So take what you need from this and enjoy the journey.
The Start of Grassroots
I won't go too deep into the full history here. I've shared that before (read more here). But it's important to touch on where it began.
I started Grassroots on the Venice Beach boardwalk with just one hat. After selling a real estate property, I used that commission check to chase my dreams. Burning Man changed everything for me. I knew I had to start living a life I actually loved.
I put my belongings in storage, lived out of my car for a few years, and went to as many events as I possibly could.
Burning the Wick at Both Ends
At that time, I was still figuring out who I was and where I belonged. I had always felt like I was falling short and dealing with some level of depression.
Starting Grassroots gave me a sense of home. I felt accepted, and I owe so much to the music, art, and counterculture communities I was surrounded by.
But going nonstop, event to event, living out of my car, pushing the brand globally, threw my life out of balance. Many artists know this feeling, especially early on when you'll say yes to everything just to get your name out there. Your health becomes secondary.
I got caught in a cycle of drugs and alcohol. I created the persona "Ruga" — someone who wasn't fully me at the time. That said, Ruga isn't gone, he's evolved into who I am today.
Back then, doing 100+ events a year, I felt like substances were the only way to keep going. After a few years, I burned out hard. I ended up taking nearly a decade off from events.
Finding Balance Again
For me, I had to hit my own version of rock bottom to see the light. My hope is that some of these tips help you get back on track before you get there. But even if you do hit rock bottom, there's only one direction to go: up.
After losing my mental stability, relationships, and nearly my business, I knew I had to change. Seventeen years in any industry is tough, especially in clothing.
These tips are geared toward artists, vendors, and musicians, but they apply to anyone hustling hard.
Routine Is Key
(Not medical advice, just lived experience from Ruga Cons.)
Sleep, Eat, Hydrate
It sounds simple, but on tour or at festivals, the basics get ignored.
- Get at least one real meal a day
- Hydrate before caffeine
- Prioritize sleep
Inconsistent sleep is one of the fastest ways to a mental breakdown. Use tools like sleep masks, earplugs, or apps like Insight Timer.
Set a Cutoff for Substances
That includes alcohol and caffeine. If you need something to keep going, your body is telling you something — listen. Alcohol wrecks sleep and recovery. Make a plan and stick to it.
Use a Buddy System
Have someone you trust — friend, partner, tour manager — who can help you stay grounded. They can help you make better decisions around hydration, rest, food, and safety when you're not at your best.
Build Healthy Habits
Even small ones matter:
- Journaling
- Meditation
Practice Grace + Take Breaks
You won't be perfect. If you fall off track, reset quickly — don't spiral.
Look into sober communities at shows like Billy Strings' Dusty Bags or Phish's Yellow Balloons. They provide support and a safe space.
And remember, it's okay to step away. Artists like Pretty Lights and GRiZ have taken breaks to prioritize mental health. You can too.
Final Thoughts
I hope this helps you find more balance, whether you're on the road, at shows, or building something of your own.
Longevity is everything. This isn't a sprint, it's a marathon. If you burn out, take the time you need to recover. But the goal is to catch yourself before the fall.
I'm excited to see where the next 17 years of Grassroots takes us.
We wouldn't be here without you.
With love,
Rugie
